The actual contents of this page may disappoint you. My dirty little secret is this: I am an emotional eater. Not what you were expecting, huh?
I will eat for just about any reason.
If I am sad and lonely I find comfort in anything sweet. I love chocolate in any form, cookies, cake, ice cream, candy, or frosting right out of the jar.
If I am happy I feel I deserve a treat like fast food or pizza.
If I am bored I find myself going through entire bags of chips or large bowls of popcorn.
Here is another secret: I have been a binge eater at times. In the past I have eaten an entire box of Little Debbie treats in one sitting. That is 12 sugar filled treats! I am embarrassed to write it but I must be honest if I want to change. I have also eaten an entire carton of sherbet in one sitting. Another time I consumed and entire large pizza, by myself, in one night.
I can’t have bags of sweets around the house. It is like they are calling my name, daring me to eat just one. The dumb part is that even while I am stuffing another treat in my face I am telling myself I shouldn’t. It is like I can’t stop. I can’t stop until the bag is empty and in the trash.
I know that during those times I was eating because of my emotions. I was either angry, sad, fearful or frustrated.
I try to tell myself not to do it but then I give in. Every time I am done stuffing my face I feel guilty and sad so it really doesn’t help with my emotions. I really need to learn from my past so I can stop doing the same things over and over while wishing for different results. Isn’t that the definition of insanity?
One thing I have never done is force myself to throw up after eating. The thought has crossed my mind, especially after a binge, but it scares me. I am so thankful that I have never gone down that path. I guess those after school specials and tv reports on anorexia made a lasting impression. My heart goes out to anybody struggling with that problem.